Hell's Kitchen (8pm, Fox) - "Hell's Kitchen," the cooking competition show for people who wish "Iron Chef" and "Top Chef" just had a little violence and profanity, begins its new season with a 2-hour premiere tonight. Gordon Ramsay is as angry and demanding as ever, and the 16 contestants are a truly staggering mix of whackos. All have huge egos, naturally, but a few border on mental or emotional instability -- all the better to push the tease of some actual physical violence this season. The big prize is a job as top chef at a restaurant in the Canadian resort town of Whistler, B.C. (site of 2010 Winter Olympics), but a few of them would be better served by a year in anger management classes. Or cooking school. Ramsay's attitude? We get that. He knows what he's doing, he has standards in his kitchen, and he's in charge. But coming from bozos who can't devein shrimp, it just feels like "crazy." One thing is for sure -- it's never boring.
Better Off Ted (9pm, ABC) - Veronica learns something that impacts her rivalry with her father, who is the CEO at another big company. Ted tries to impress his father by bragging about a Veridian discovery which could cure baldness.
Miami Social (10pm, Bravo) - Did I mention that I hate this show? Mostly I hate that Ariel person, but honestly, they should have just named this show The Real A-Holes of Miami.
Real Sports with Bryant Gumbel (10pm, HBO) - One segment is with former Oakland Raider Barrett Robbins (right), who went AWOL the night before the 2003 Super Bowl. Also, a profile of boxing trainer Freddie Roach, and a 14-year-old cancer patient adopted by the Northwestern University women's lacrosse team.