Top Chef: caramel apple peanut soup sounds disgusting... and it is

Before I recap this week's episode, I must offer a confession: Top Chef is making me fat.

It's not difficult to figure out why: watching a show about delicious food is akin to fast-food commercials - external hunger pangs trigger immediately, and within a few minutes (seconds), I'm craving all sorts of culinary delights I can't even begin to pronounce. There's all sorts of science behind this.

Last night got out of hand, though. After having dinner around Glee-time (I was trying to take preventative measures by stuffing myself before the show), I lost my willpower right about when I saw Padma and guest judge/food vixen Nigella Lawson indulging in breakfast while wearing plush white robes in a hotel room. So I ordered pizza. Just for me. Heinous. I didn't eat the whole thing, mind you, but the fact that I can't even be trusted enough to watch a television show when I'm full without ordering food is something that concerns me. Perhaps I'm not the only one out there with this problem.

Moving on... we're down to the final six, and there's minimal drama moving forward. (Though they're still trying to highlight every time someone's rude to Robin, which was down to one time this episode.)

The Quickfire Challenge involved cooking Padma and Nigella a room-service breakfast. It was sort of uncomfortable to watch the two of them lie around in robes acting coy, but I'm just a heterosexual female, so what I do know? Robin and Bryan (gasp) served out duds. Bryan's was probably good but Nigella doesn't like the smell of vanilla in the morning so that counted against him. Eli won the Quickfire.

The main elimination challenge was to cater a 175-person event with a dish inspired by a specific hotel on the Las Vegas Strip.

Jennifer, who appears to have suffered a breakdown over the last few episodes, was inspired by one of those medieval dinner-shows and makes a "sword and stone" dish that looks like a big piece of meat to me. (But still kind of cool, I think.) The judges, who have clearly noticed Jennifer's surprising downfall, credit her with a good concept but don't think the meat is tender or seasoned enough.

Kevin (my favorite and pick to win it all) creates a salmon and vegetable dish after going to the Mirage. The judges love it, no surprises here.

Bryan visits Mandalay Bay and tries to incorporate sustainable fishing practices into his cooking. (I don't really understand how that works when you're killing and eating fish, but I'm not Natalie Portman, so I don't really care.) He makes a "quiet and elegant" halibut with pine nuts, parsley and garlic chips on top.

Side note: Listen, I didn't write down all the formal names or whatever of the food, so don't call me out on that. I bet there's someone at the N&O who might know better than me, anywho. I'm just a television watcher.

Voltaggio brother # 2, Michael, (seriously, has anyone figured out a good way to tell these two apart?) makes chicken wings with bleu cheese dressing after visiting New York New York. It sounded to me like this was a cop-out creation but he must've put crack in that dressing because the judges LOVED it. He won the elimination challenge.

Robin, clearly a victim of red hair discrimination, makes a terrible panna cotta, a dish that amounts of "child's play" for chefs, Nigella says. She adds, "To me, panna cotta should quiver like a 17th century courtesan's inner thigh." Damn, Robin.

Side note number two: Nigella really grew on me during the course of the show, so if Padma ever dare leave, she gets my vote as an adequate replacement.

Lastly, Eli went to Circus Circus and probably had the most difficult time creating a sophisticated dish. So he doesn't, instead opting for a caramel apple peanut soup with popcorn and raspberry broth. It sounds disgusting, and it is (Padma says she hopes never to eat it again), but the judges give Eli props for taking a risk.

In the end, it was Robin who (finally) had to go. We've been waiting for this a long time now. The top five truly do seem like the best chefs in this competition, so I'm excited to see what shakes out. I hope Jennifer gets back in her zone because I do think she might be in real danger next week after such a promising start to the season.

You can click here if you want to see photos of all of this week's dishes (and yes, even their real, unpronounceable names). I'm not posting any photos because it's too late for me to order another pizza. Or is it?