It's not exactly something to be proud of, but North Carolina's former Sen. John Edwards got more attention on last night's "Saturday Night Live," all because of ... well, you know.
Edwards, who has also been a candidate for president and a vice presidential nominee, had his legacy painfully summed up in a "Larry King Live" skit that would have made Oscar Mayer proud. Read below for more on the sketch, and my apologies in advance to delicatessen owners everywhere.
In the sketch, Larry (Fred Armisen) has assembled a group of experts to discuss why so many famous men are getting in trouble with their "weiners."
The panel is comprised of media experts played by Drew Barrymore, Kristin Wiig, and Jason Sudeikis. The group astutely decides that the trouble occurs when weiners want to go someplace where they shouldn't, and that such news is so popular because men like knowing what other men do with their weiners, and women like seeing pictures of women who have touched famous weiners so that they can compare themselves physically to those women.
Also, the proliferation of weiners on the internet is hurting "weiner print media."
In the Edwards bit, Kristin Wiig's character says: "If you're a celebrity and you've done something embarrassing with your weiner, that's all people remember. Like John Edwards. He was a distinguished Senator, but I mostly remember him for his weiner."
"John Edwards was a senator?" Barrymore asks, incredulously.
"John Edwards the weiner guy?" Sudeikis follows.
"See! This just proves my point!" Wiig responds. "All you guys care about is his weiner!"
"Yeah, you're right. I love it. I do. I'm sorry," they all answer in unison.
Sudeikis goes on to suggest that someone come up with a reasonable standard by which to judge men who do bad things with their weiners -- an International Weiner Conduct Rating System: "John Phillips would be a 10 on the Bad Weiner Scale, and Letterman would be a 2. Now Polanski is a 9, or a European 4."