DWTS: Boobs get in the way

Once again, the Happiness bloggers elected my mom our Dancing with the Stars correspondent. After each show, she calls me with her report...

Tonight the dancers got one more twirl on the dance floor before tomorrow night's elimination show. Most improved from last week, but in two cases, heaving bosoms seemed to be a handicap.

Holly and Dimetri, Quick Step. "So far they are the most improved but Lynn said he thought Holly's bust was 'too forward.' The girl can't help that she's a Playboy bunny!"

David Alan Grier and Kim, Salsa. "He didn't do very well on his dance but I enjoyed their rehearsal. The judges didn't like him."

Denise and Maks, Quick Step. "I thought they were good. Maks is always good and he'll make her look good. The were better than last week."

Belinda and Jonathan, Salsa. "I don't think she's going to get any better. She just doesn't have it."

Ty and Chelsea, Quick Step. "He was very good. He's still funny and he's still my favorite. He did not miss a step and he got high praises from the judges."

Shawn and Mark, Salsa. "They have a high score. She's a good little dancer! And he's awesome."

Steve and Carina, Quick Step. "He went to the doctor and they said he's crushing his foot so they put a walking cast on him, but he didn't have it on when he did the quck step. He could MOVE. He's having more fun than anybody out there. He's gonna have to go home, though. He said he's never had so much fun. He sure can move for a guy his size."

Chuck and Julianne, Salsa. "I thought they were pretty good, but the judges just talked trash about him. I don't really know what they meant but I thought they did pretty well."
 
LT and Etyka, Quick Step. "He was much better. He's very competitive -- he worked and worked and worked and was determined the was going to do it."

Next ... "Jack-O (aka Steve-O from Jackass) got hurt during dress rehearsal. They judged him on that dance and it was pretty bad. He was worse than the Apple guy. They said what he did was not even the Salsa. He had to go to the hospital."

Lil Kim and Derek, Quick Step. "They were very good. The only problem judges had was no body contact. She blamed her boobs for it, but whatever. Derek's choreography was so good and they got a good score. Just watching him is worth the whole dance."

Melissa and Tony, Salsa. "They were good. The judges thought it was the best salsa of the night, but I'm tired of her. I think I've seen her too much this year. I just don't want to see her anymore."

Gilles and Cheryl, Quick Step. "They were very good. They ended up with the top score and they are tops for both weeks with total score. During rehearsals, Cheryl told him to 'drop the sexy' and be elegant for that dance. Whew. Didn't work. He was elegant but he was still sexy. He did the whole Clark Kent/Superman thing."

"I think it's gonna end up between Gilles and Cheryl, and Mark and Shawn, and maybe Derek and Lil Kim," my mom predicts. We'll hold her to that...