Bob Vance pays $1,000 to hug his own wife

For those of you left craving more screen time for Pam and Jim's long-distance love affair, too bad. Thursday's episode of "The Office" was all about Michael and Holly's romance, which took a big leap forward with their third date.

And poor Dwight, who regained a bit of this viewer's respect by going an entire show without giving birth to a watermelon or dragging a baby stroller behind his Firebird, is left whittling a knife with a knife by the news that Andy and Angela have set a wedding date.

I think we know why Dunder Mifflin's struggling as a company. Does anyone have time to sell paper anymore?

Michael is too distracted by the planning of his third date with the anti-Toby to care, obviously. As Michael tells us, third date usually equals sex, although he's not sure if Holly subscribes to the same philosophy.

"If she starts having sex with me, I'll know for sure," Michael theorizes.

The master of bad segueways, Michael can't help but blurt out to Holly his hopes of getting all "Grey's Anatomy" with her while they're discussing mall food-court dining options for the big date.

Holly's "[Heck] ya!" response to his awkward plea cements the deal and confirms she truly is the one for Michael Scott. (At least until the show's writers reveal their exit plan for Amy Ryan so she can get back to her film career.)

That leaves Michael to plot the proper meal plan for the big night: "I'll probably get some soup, something light."

Michael and Holly introduce the world to the foreplay value of playing a few hands of Crazy Eights before sealing the deal in the office stairwell. We think that's how it happened, although Michael attempted to turn down the microphones to ensure some privacy.

Of course, they were so giddy in the afterglow that they forgot to lock up the building when they left, and burglars ransacked the Dunder Mifflin office overnight. Oscar had his laptop stolen, while Kevin lost his surge protector. And yes, Oscar, losing a surge protector hurts as much as having your laptop stolen. "I'm now going to be prone to surges," Kevin whines to Oscar.

Always thinking ahead, fellow accountant Angela calls the bank to cancel checks 10001 through 90000. Dwight is too distracted by the "save the date" note that Andy dropped on his desk to go into expected volunteer sheriff's deputy mode. After Phyllis reminds Dwight that she caught him and Angela going all "Grey's Anatomy" in the office one night, she asks him if he wants to talk about it.

It takes Dwight a few moments to warm up to the idea before confiding to Phyllis that Angela opened up a whole new world to him, a world that includes sheets, monotheism, pasteurized milk and preventative medicine. Phyllis convinces Dwight to confront Angela and challenge her to make a choice between life with Andy or warehouse quickies with a passionate beet farmer.

It's a tough choice for Angela, because Andy offers his own brand of protection — "You'll always be safe with me. I'm a very good screamer." — and the promise of moving one day to Celebration, Disney's "Truman Show" community in Florida.

Dwight's deadline for an answer comes and goes with the beeping of his Casio watch as Angela ignores his meaningful glances during CRIMEAID. Of course, CRIMEAID is short for "Crime Reduces Innocence, Makes Everyone Angry ... I Declare." It's Michael's answer to Farm Aid, which as he understands it, is farmers fighting against AIDS.

To goose interest in the auction fundraiser to replace the "vintage" HP computers and other items looted overnight, Michael dangles the promise of two, front-row seats to a Bruce Springsteen concert. Everyone should have doubted whether he had the tickets, given Michael's track record. That, and the disclosure by warehouse supervisor Darryl that Michael had a shaky grasp of the Boss's oeuvre.

Top moment of the episode for this Springsteen fan: Darryl confiding that of the 10 Springsteen songs that Michael asked him to queue up on the boom box for the auction, three were tracks by Huey Lewis and the News, one was Tracy Chapman's "Fast Cars" and a fifth was Randy Newman's "Short People."

So of course there were no Bruce tickets, but Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration was there to bail everyone out with a feel-good moment, ultimately bidding $1,000 for a hug from his wife Phyllis. With Bob Vance of Vance Refrigeration's $1,000 pledge, CRIMEAID raised $1,803, for those keeping score.

Dunder-Mifflin chief financial officer David Wallace lent his support to CRIMEAID by offering the auction a weekend in his place on Martha's Vineyard. Ultimately, though, Wallace was there to catch Michael and Holly smooching in the warehouse.

After the ordeal of Jan's sexual harassment suit against the company, it was clear that Wallace was less than amused that Michael was romancing another company employee. And there you have the seeds for Holly's departure from the show, we're guessing.

All this, and we haven't even mentioned Jim going out for some beers with Darryl and the warehouse guys and bumping into Pam's old fiance Roy. Or Jim's panicked "almost" drive to New York City to visit Pam after he gets worried that she's having too much fun without him. Good to know, as Jim tells us after he pulls a U-turn and avoid showing up in NYC as the clingy, jealous boyfriend, "I am not that guy, and we are not that couple."