90210 (8pm, CW) - Season 3 opens with a deadly earthquake in Beverly Hills and Beverly coping with her rape. Also, Teddy faces a future without tennis after suffering an injury, and Annie and Liam make a decision about their relationship.

Bachelor Pad (8pm, ABC) - It's over. After a "Dancing with the Stars" type competition and a reunion of all 19 contenders, the first season's winners are announced.

Gossip Girl (9pm, CW) - In the fourth season opener, Blair and Serena enjoy summer in Paris trying to forget about the  guys back home, until blair sees Chuck in France. Elsewhere, Nate meets a woman who gives him insight into his recent playboy ways and Dan must deal with a pregnant Georgina.

Click below to read about a new Lifetime movie, plus season finales for "The Closer," "Rizzoli & Isles," and "Lie to Me."

Hoarders (9pm, A&E) - The third season of "Hoarders" opens tonight with two back-to-back new episodes. In the first episode we meet a woman whose estranged husband asks his children to help their mom clean up her house in the weeks before he dies, to keep the home from being condemned by the city. In the second episode, a couple and their two grown children are given 72 hours by the city to clean or vacate their home, from which Animal Control has already removed their seven cats. I'm depressed just writing about this.

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - The squad looks for clues in the death of an aspiring actress, and Brenda prepares for her interview for the chief of police job, even though she has reservations about it. And there have to be repurcussions from Brenda's actions at the end of last week's episode, right? Mary McDonnell returns as Capt. Raydor.

Real Housewives of New Jersey (9pm, Bravo) - It's the conclusion of the reunion show and all I know is that previews show host Andy Cohen running off the set. Someone watch it and tell me why.

Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations (9pm, Travel) - Bourdain's seventh season and 100th episode take him to the Grenadine Islands where he goes fishing, scuba diving, and tries to hunt a local delicacy.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Jane is swept up into Boston's Irish-mob past when she probes the murder of an identity thief, who seemingly had no real identity of his own. Meanwhile, Maura makes a discovery that propels her on intensely personal odyssey. Episode directed by Adam Arkin.

Thintervention with Jackie Warner (10pm, Bravo) - A new show from Bravo in which fitness expert Jackie Warner inspires lifestyle changes for clients hoping to shed some pounds. Check out Adrienne's review.

"Dancing with the Stars" Announcement Special (8pm, ABC) - Also known as "Bachelor Pad." The dancers for the upcoming season will be announced at some point during this two-hour herpes distribution experiment.

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - The always great Gary Cole (right) is guest starring tonight as a military officer battling Brenda as she investigates the shooting deaths of three marines who had just returned from Afghanistan. Also of interest, the fallout from Chief Pope's devastating job news at the end of last week's episode.

Real Housewives of New Jersey (9pm, Bravo) - The second part of the two-part finale airs at 9pm (no table-flipping in the first part!) and then at 10pm we get the first part of the reunion show. Don't forget to enter our contest to win Season One of RHONJ on dvd! Today is the last day to enter.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Serial killer Charles Hoyt (from the first and best episode so far this season) returns tonight. The sinister slayer who once tried to murder Jane might be at it again when a body with his MO turns up in the park. As Jane's fear deepens, Maura tries to track the killer.

Weeds (10pm, Showtime) - Trying to keep on the down-low in Washington, Nancy, Andy, and Silas take under-the-table jobs at a fancy hotel in Seattle. Nancy also makes a connection with a new supplier, played by Linda Hamilton.

Bachelor Pad (8pm, ABC) - A "stomach churning" challenge awaits the remaining 17 contestants. Does that mean they make them watch an episode of this show?

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - Fighting hard for the Chief of Police job, Pope implements a plan to improve the department's public image in the wake of the brutal slaying of a parole board member who was killed during a phone call with Gabriel. All while Brenda, also in the candidate pool, works to solve the murder.

Lie to Me (9pm, Fox) - Cal and Zoe (Jennifer Beals) are called to witness the execution of a man (David Marciano) they helped send to death row 17 years before, while facing the possibility that he could be innocent.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Jane goes undercover to solve the murder of a woman who was leaving a gay bar. Meanwhile, Maura plays matchmaker and sets Jane up with a yoga instructor. Antonio Sabato Jr and Brenda Strong guest star.

Weeds (10pm, Showtime) - In the sixth season opener, Nancy (Mary Louise Parker) and the boys are on the lam after Pilar's murder. Meanwhile, Andy wrestles with whether or not to take on the "antiabortionist with the crossbow" who has taken Audra hostage at the house in Ren Mar.

The Big C (10:30pm, Showtime) - A new show about a suburban Minneapolis schoolteacher (Laura Linney) with cancer. In tonight's first episode, she struggles to tell her estranged husband, her homeless brother, and her children about her illness. Adrienne gives Linney an A+.

Bachelor Pad (8pm, ABC) - This is like "Bachelor/Bachelorette" meets "Big Brother," or maybe even something worse if we could think of anything worse. Basically, a bunch of rejects from all the "Bachelore/Bachelorette" shows are locked up in a house with tons of booze and bathing suits. They get drunk, make out, fight, play games, cry (we're looking at you, Weatherman), etc. Chris Harrison and Melissa Rycroft host. To lure you to watch, ABC is announcing the new cast of "Dancing with the Stars" during the show and we're hearing bachelorette Ali is on. (Oops. ABC is announcing the DWTS line-up during the August 30 episode of "Bachelor Pad.") All of this is followed by the second season of the equally nauseating "Dating in the Dark" at 10pm.

Teen Choice Awards 2010 (8pm, Fox) - The 12th annual awards show will have performances by Justin Bieber, Diddy-Dirty Money, Jason Derulo, Travie McCoy, and Bruno Mars. Also appearing, Twilight stars, Kardashians, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, and of course, Betty White. If Yahoo search statistics are any kind of indicator, the Kardashians will do very well (and this makes us very sad for America's youth).

Too Fat for 15 (8pm, Style) - A new show about teens at Wellspring weight loss camp located in Brevard, North Carolina. Featured on the show is Raleigh teen Emily Hodge. Read more about Emily and the show.

Phineas and Ferb (8pm, Disney) - That Clay Aiken/Chaka Khan episode repeats.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Jane and Maura investigate when a member of a wealthy Boston family is found dead, but the investigation is clouded by Maura's ties to the family and by Jane's bitterness toward their showy wealth. Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Peter Onorati guest star.

The Bachelorette (8pm, ABC) - In tonight's finale episode, Ali arrives in Bora Bora with Chris and Roberto. Her family is also there, and they like each guy equally. No help there. The previews show both Chris and Roberto saying things like "I'm not ready for this" and "I'm not there yet." And Ali says "I have wasted my time." So who knows what the heck will happen. Don't forget the "After the Final Rose" special at 10pm in which Ali, Chris, and Roberto all show up to discuss what happened in the finale.

Good Guys (9pm, Fox) - A crime family sends a hitman to kill a man in Witness Protrection Program after Dan accidentally exposes his identity. Then it's up to Jack and a beautiful U.S. Marshall to protect the man's life.

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - Oh goodie, my favorite: a Provenza episode. Provenza stumbles into a compromising situation when he romances a flight attendant on company time and discovers a dead body in her condominium.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Jane and Maura look into the death of a female college student and Jane's mother gets into an argument over a car.

Scream Queens (10pm, VH1) - Ten aspiring actresses compete for a part in "Saw 3D" in this season two opener.

Jeopardy (7pm, ABC) - I personally think everyone should be watching "Jeopardy" tonight.

Bachelorette: The Men Tell All (8pm, ABC) - Some of the men already dumped by Ali (left) show up to talk about the season. Missing is Justin the wrestler, who went on the show with not one but two girlfriends, and Frank, who decided at the last minute he still loved his ex. Both men will be discussed. "20/20" has a special "Behind the Rose" show at 10pm.

Lie to Me (8pm, Fox) - The death of a young woman at a gubernatorial campaign event in Virginia has the Lightman Group exploring conflicting scenarios of foul play.

Homeless: The Motel Kids of Orange County (9pm, HBO) - From HBO's summer documentary series, a chronicle of homeless kids in Orange County, California, who live in motels with their families while attending school year-round. Produced and directed by Alexandra Pelosi ("Journeys with George").

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - A boy's puzzling death leads Jane and Maura that he may have died during an exorcism. Also, Jane's mother (Lorraine Bracco) sets her up on blind date. 

Bachelorette (8pm, ABC) - It's Fantasy Suite night in Tahiti, and also the night Frank has his big emotional breakdown. Can't wait to see if he flakes out on Ali before or after the sleep over.

Lucky (9pm, HBO) - The latest in HBO's summer documentary series is a look at the seductive power of the lottery. Nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at Sundance.

Good Guys (9pm, Fox) - Jack and Dan believe rumors of a bank robbery are just an attempt to distract from a much larger heist. If this show got on your nerves too much when it first debuted (specifically, the technophobic Bradley Whitford character), give it another shot. Over the last couple of episodes, Det. Dan Stark has been toned down a bit -- just enough to still be funny while not making you want to kill him. (Now watch them go and have him karate-chopping another computer tonight, just to prove me wrong).

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - Mary McDonnell returns as internal affairs officer Capt. Raydor, to help Brenda investigate a vanished nanny who has connections to the Los Angeles mayor. Raydor may have ulterior motives for shadowing Brenda.

The Client List (9pm, Lifetime) - A new lifetime movie starring Jennifer Love Hewitt as a mother who turns to prostitution to support her family. We have a review.

Do Something Awards (9pm, VH1) - An awards show honoring social activism by young people, hosted by Jane Lynch.

RuPaul's Drag U (9pm, Logo) - The first episode in a new series in which drag queen RuPaul offers makeover advice to women. Our review.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - Boston is on edge when an alleged copycat of the Boston Strangler emerges. Also, Jane (Angie Harmon) clashes with her new boss, played by Donnie Wahlberg. 

There's something to be said for knowing what your customers want and delivering, and while watching "Rizzoli & Isles" (10 tonight), I was struck by how thoroughly TNT the show is.

Besides having two strong, accomplished women at the center of it, the show has that same mix of grit and humor as "The Closer" and "Leverage" and "Saving Grace." And although the network stakes its claim with drama, characters are welcome on TNT too.

That's the other thing that struck me after viewing this very likable, fairly creepy first episode of "Rizzoli & Isles" -- it's a first episode that firmly lets us know who these characters are through the plot rather than through exposition like a lot of first episodes do. There's no starting out slow here; it comes out the gate with a crime that hits close to the characters.

Lie to Me (8pm, Fox) - After a housing project shooting, the police want Cal to read the face of a man who is paralyzed and can only move his eyes.

A Small Act (9pm, HBO) - Next up in HBO's summer documentary series is this chronicle of a UN human rights advocate's efforts to locate the Swedish benefactor whose monthly donations helped deliver him from poverty in rural Kenya. Nominated for a Grand Jury Prize at Sundance.

The Closer (9pm, TNT) - Season 6 of basic cable's most popular series opens with the shooting death of a ladies man and the Major Case Squad struggling to adjust to their fancy new police digs. Plus, something is up with Captain Pope... Read more here.

Rizzoli & Isles (10pm, TNT) - The debut of a new drama about a team of disparate female crime fighters in Boston. Stars Angie Harmon ("Law & Order" "Women's Murder Club") as the cop and Sasha Alexander as the medical examiner. Check out Adrienne's review.

Real Housewives of New Jersey (10pm, Bravo) - One of these ridiculous white trash fights finally results in a call to the cops.

Children's Hospital (10:30pm, Adult Swim) - The premiere of a new satirical series from "The Daily Show's" Rob Cordry that mocks hospital dramas such as "Grey's Anatomy" and "ER." TV Guide describes it as "often grotesque."