Pity "Survivor" chieftan Mark Burnett so far this season. Here he's got a former sitcom star, a former pro baseball player and two former players that could be bringing some interesting drama, but producers aren't getting to spend much screen time on them. That's because they keep having to focus on one of the most inept tribes in "Survivor" history.

Yes, pitiful Matsing — or as Malcolm called it, "The Goon Squad" — was back to Tribal Council for the third straight time this week. The goons landed there after a pathetic Immunity Challenge performance where only half of the four-person team — muscular Malcolm and tough sex therapist Denise — showed the slightest hint of athletic aptitude.

Russell, the dreadlocked returning player who talks a good game, faltered as he attempted to dive into the ocean and collect pieces for a puzzle. He even had trouble climbing a three-rung ladder to get out of the water. But he was a regular Ryan Lochte when compared to Angie, right. The sweet-but-dumb beauty queen hardly even tried. She went into the water just once, then decided that this was just not her thing. But later, she wanted us to know that she is not someone who gives up easily. (Sorry, Ang, but you kinda are.)

... you take them both and there you have the 25th season of "Survivor," which returned Wednesday with a colorful cast that includes a North Carolina cosmetologist, three returning players who left the game because of injuries and a former Major League Baseball player. And, oh yes, the reason why we have an '80s TV theme song stuck in our head — Blair from "The Facts of Life" herself, former actress Lisa Whelchel.

But first that North Carolinian, Dana Lambert, right, of Winston-Salem. In the screen time she got during the 90-minute first episode, Dana extols her tattoos, her piercings and her general punked-out Southern girl vibe. Growing up, she tells us, she would happily "fight any boy in the trailer park." Not sure that's exactly the representation the Winston-Salem Chamber of Commerce was dreaming of, but OK then, Dana. (Disclaimer: I'm a Winston-Salem native and can vouch that Dana is not the only such character in the city.)

The three returning players — a gimmick I'm not that crazy about — are Russell Swan, the dreadlocked, non-evil Russell who left the show during his season after passing out; Jonathan Penner, the Alan Alda-soundalike who had to leave previously because of a life-threatening infection; and Michael Skupin, evacuated after he famously fell into the fire way back in Season 2.