Pity "Survivor" chieftan Mark Burnett so far this season. Here he's got a former sitcom star, a former pro baseball player and two former players that could be bringing some interesting drama, but producers aren't getting to spend much screen time on them. That's because they keep having to focus on one of the most inept tribes in "Survivor" history.

Yes, pitiful Matsing — or as Malcolm called it, "The Goon Squad" — was back to Tribal Council for the third straight time this week. The goons landed there after a pathetic Immunity Challenge performance where only half of the four-person team — muscular Malcolm and tough sex therapist Denise — showed the slightest hint of athletic aptitude.

Russell, the dreadlocked returning player who talks a good game, faltered as he attempted to dive into the ocean and collect pieces for a puzzle. He even had trouble climbing a three-rung ladder to get out of the water. But he was a regular Ryan Lochte when compared to Angie, right. The sweet-but-dumb beauty queen hardly even tried. She went into the water just once, then decided that this was just not her thing. But later, she wanted us to know that she is not someone who gives up easily. (Sorry, Ang, but you kinda are.)

There wasn't much screen time for our North Carolina cosmetologist on the second episode of "Survivor: Philippines." But we'll say this for young Dana Lambert — at least she's playing like she's seen this show before. That's not the case with some of her fellow players, whose gameplay was just dumb, dumb, dumb.

To wit, anyone with even a passing interest in "Survivor" knows that you don't align yourself, um, physically with the Sexy Young Thang you just met. But that's exactly what dopey bartender Malcolm does with this season's designated SYT, former Miss Utah Teen Angie. The two, at right, spend a lot of time cuddling up because they say they're cold. But their behavior is just putting big targets on both their backs.

It's also not wise to separate yourself from the rest of your tribe, but that's just what Lisa ("Blair" from TV!) does. The former "Facts of Life" star tells us she's always been a bit of a loner. (And here we thought she was tight with Tootie and Natalie.) On "Survivor," of course, going off on your own usually spells doom.

... you take them both and there you have the 25th season of "Survivor," which returned Wednesday with a colorful cast that includes a North Carolina cosmetologist, three returning players who left the game because of injuries and a former Major League Baseball player. And, oh yes, the reason why we have an '80s TV theme song stuck in our head — Blair from "The Facts of Life" herself, former actress Lisa Whelchel.

But first that North Carolinian, Dana Lambert, right, of Winston-Salem. In the screen time she got during the 90-minute first episode, Dana extols her tattoos, her piercings and her general punked-out Southern girl vibe. Growing up, she tells us, she would happily "fight any boy in the trailer park." Not sure that's exactly the representation the Winston-Salem Chamber of Commerce was dreaming of, but OK then, Dana. (Disclaimer: I'm a Winston-Salem native and can vouch that Dana is not the only such character in the city.)

The three returning players — a gimmick I'm not that crazy about — are Russell Swan, the dreadlocked, non-evil Russell who left the show during his season after passing out; Jonathan Penner, the Alan Alda-soundalike who had to leave previously because of a life-threatening infection; and Michael Skupin, evacuated after he famously fell into the fire way back in Season 2.

A 32-year-old cosmetologist from Winston-Salem will join "Blair" from "The Facts of Life," a certified sex therapist, the former Miss Delaware and Major League Baseball's former National League MVP on the next season of "Survivor."

Dana Lambert told Entertainment Weekly that the competition, set in the Phillippines, could be problematic since she's not a strong swimmer: "I've never really swam in the in the ocean, so this will be interesting."

According to the magazine, Lambert has been through rehab for an addiction to amphetamines. As much strength as that must take, Lambert still recognizes that "Survivor" is going to be tough (and we don't just mean putting up with Jeff Probst): "Being on a deserted island is going to be hard no matter what," she said.

You can read more and see a video of Lambert at the EW.com site.

The new season of "Survivor: Phillippines" will start on September 19 on CBS.