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Among the "Secrets of Eden" is that it's a bad film

During "Secrets of Eden" (8 tonight, Lifetime), there's a special effect that happens whenever star John Stamos thinks back to a past episode. The figures enter the scene in slow motion before the action comes to life.

That's how I felt watching this film; it was a slow, dull slog through a slug of a film. And the action never comes to life.

Stamos plays Pastor Stephen Drew, a beloved small-town minister in Vermont who becomes a murder suspect after a member of his church Alice Hayward (Sonya Salomaa) is found dead a few feet away from her husband, who is dead too, from a bullet in the head. Their deaths leaves daughter Kate (Samantha Munro) an orphan.

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